Category Archives: Bitching

I bitch a lot.

FIN

Well fuckers, this is it. I’m done here. For all of my 520 followers and 2 actual readers, I wanted to let you all know that this site has done all it can for me, and I am now retiring it and the Beefy persona that has been part of my life for the last 15 years. The Facebook page is going to come down as well, but the Twitter account will still remain active, just because I enjoy using it. Lastly, if any of you actually follow my Tumblr page, you should probably stop. I do post on it from time to time, but it’s nothing worth seeing. So just stop.

Stop.

You can unfollow this blog, and join me at my new place, Martians Attack! Why Martians? Cause fuck you, that’s why.

I’d like to say it’s been real, but whatever. Bye.

Shitty Restaurants: Cheddar’s

I watched an episode of Kitchen Nightmares once where Chef Gordon Ramsey was at some shit hole trying to help them make it work. One of the biggest problems they had was their “chef” who wasn’t very good at cooking. To test him, Chef Ramsey asked him to make an omelette. He couldn’t.

You see, Chef Ramsey asked the guy to make something simple. Not some sort of French duck dish. A fucking omelette. And he couldn’t do it.

This is how all restaurants should be judged, and this is how I judge all that I go to. I have certain things that I order, depending on what kind of restaurant I go to. My wife yells at me for never trying new things. But, it’s all part of my master plan. You see, among all other kinds of restaurants, if I go to a place that sells burgers, I order a burger. Specifically, a mushroom swiss burger, if they serve them. And if they can’t do that right, then why the hell would I want to order anything else from them?

Burgers are as American as American gets. They’re so American that on any given street where businesses abound, you can have three fast food burger joints lined up next to each other, and a new place will open across the street also selling burgers. Burgers are a staple. Anybody who cooks food of any kind should know how to cook a hamburger correctly. It’s not hard.

It is literally this easy. Take yourself however much ground beef you need. A quarter pound, third pound, half pound, whatever. You smoosh it with your hands until it resembles a patty. You cook it. It’s done. Sometimes you can even go all out and season it with a sprinkle of salt and pepper on each side while it cooks.

Now, was that so fucking hard? If you go to a sit down place, it shouldn’t take but 5 to 10 minutes for you to get your hamburger after you order it, depending on how busy the place is. They don’t take long to cook, and they’re easy to cook. And if you’re really good at making them, they don’t even need a lot of TLC. Once they’re on the grill, you literally only have to flip them once. I had a girlfriend who was like that.

The reason I bring this up is, my wife and I decided to try a new place that opened up here a couple years ago called Cheddar’s. Since I’m a fan of cheese and the name of the place is one of my favorite cheeses, I thought this would be a no brainer. Besides, the place looks awesome.

We had a date day one day and decided to eat there before going to see a movie. I saw they had a mushroom swiss burger and promptly ordered that, while getting the business from my wife about always ordering the same shit. She ordered fried chicken strips. I’m pretty sure we ordered an appetizer, like a quesadilla or something, but it wasn’t good enough for me to remember if we actually did order one or not.

Cheddar’s are located all over the mid-west. That doesn’t mean they’re good, it just means they’re a chain. Same could be said for Applebee’s. Fuck Applebee’s.
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Election 2016 And Future Elections

I was just talking to my mom about the upcoming election. The conversation started when I said how excited I was for this coming Tuesday because this whole fucking thing will be over. She agreed, and said it’ll just turn into something else to get on our nerves, to which I agreed and said we’ll have four years of people bitching about who the new President is.

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It was then, that I had a fantastic idea.

I think for all future elections, whatever party the Presidential candidate is, their running mate should be the opposite. Democratic President? Republican Vice-President. If anything it would make all of the bitching and finger pointing towards each candidate more interesting. And hey, maybe it would even things out a bit in the White House.

Because it really doesn’t matter who wins, things are going to suck. It doesn’t matter who wins, because half of the country is going to bitch about the President for their entire term. Obama is almost out of office and people have taken time out of bitching about this election, to complain about him. He’s almost fucking gone and people are still bitching. Let it the fuck go. Ain’t you people ever happy? Holy shit.

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It doesn’t matter who you vote for, or how you vote, there are plenty of people out there who are going to tell you you’re wrong or you’re wasting your vote. A couple weeks ago I made a comment on a friends post about the election, where I said both candidates suck and I’m voting third party. Holy shit. One guy decided to write a short story on not only how wrong my vote was, but how much of a piece of shit I am. He cussed me out and called me all kinds of things. This guy has no idea who I am, yet felt completely obligated to cuss me out because I wasn’t voting exactly like he was.

The best part is, I get to share this country with him. He is my fellow American citizen. That guy.
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Voting

This is a voting year unlike any we’ve had, maybe ever. For years I’ve said that we shouldn’t vote until they give us somebody to vote for. Unfortunately, the majority of people in this country vote because they think they’re making a difference. Maybe they are, maybe they’re not. This year we have to pick between one of the worst candidates ever, and another one of the worst candidates ever.

My problem, or one of them anyway, is that we are told who to vote for. Our choices are limited. I don’t belong to a side. And those who are, mostly always vote for their candidate, no matter how good or bad that candidate is. That is not good. That’s being close minded, and that’s being irresponsible with your vote. If everybody was a “middle of the road” voter, the votes would be more unbiased. But that’s never going to happen.

As a person who has no political affiliation, I’m constantly torn between voting for one shitty candidate and another shitty candidate.

Could I vote for a third party? Sure, but will they win? Hell no. Not with so many staunch left and right voters. Third party candidates aren’t even allowed to be in the debates. And there are people who say the system isn’t rigged.

This year, I’ve lost more friends (on Facebook) than ever before over the election. Of those I’ve unfriended, none were because of who they were voting for. They were all because of their shitty attitudes.

This is yet another problem I have. We’re all Americans, yet we turn into assholes during election season, and we start hating, literally hating, our fellow Americans. United we stand, eh? Politics and religion bring out the worst in people. And I’m sick of it.
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Mr. Colin Kaepernick, I Salute You

By now I’m sure you’ve heard all about 49ers QB Colin Kaepernick and how he refused to stand for the national anthem before his preseason game a week or so ago. And I’m sure if you watch the news, you’re probably all pissed off about it. I can’t logon to Facebook without seeing tons of irate people on my friends list, posting things about how he should love it or leave it, and how he’s a white guy and shouldn’t be oppressed by anything, and so on.

Here’s why he said he didn’t stand…

“I am not going to stand up to show pride in a flag for a country that oppresses black people and people of color. To me, this is bigger than football and it would be selfish on my part to look the other way. There are bodies in the street and people getting paid leave and getting away with murder.”

OUTRAGE! BOO! HISS! HE’S SO UNAMERICAN!
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