I Saved Money On This Blog Post

My wife and I were on our way home when she mentioned she wanted to stop at Walgreens for some stuff. We were about to be near a CVS before the Walgreens so I said something about stopping there instead. She said no, because she doesn’t like CVS and prefers Walgreens. I’m the same way. In my head I thought about why I liked Walgreens over CVS. For one, they don’t have a shoppers card. That’s a huge bonus for me. I can’t stand those fucking things.

We stopped and did our shopping. We reached the register and the cashier asked us if we had their shoppers card. I literally said, “Son. Of. A. Bitch.”

All the stores have them now. All of them. And their purpose is simple. When you get one you give them all of your info. Your name, address, phone number, email address. They store your info in a huge database with all of the other info from all of the other shoppers. The stores then discount certain products for card holders specifically, so that when you shop you have to use the card. When you use the card, the store sees just what it is you came to them for. So now they not only know what you like to buy, but how much you buy it and where you bought it. So whatever money they lost on giving you a little savings pays for itself by all of the data they collected from you, which will help them to market their products to not just you, but everybody else who bought that item and used their savings card.

I don’t know why some pussy would post a video of Bill Burr censored, but whatever. He says “fuck” a lot, and why not? He’s talking about stuff that pisses him off. It’s hard to convey anger when you don’t cuss. And not cussing p!$$#s me the f#&k off.

Before the savings card came out you would sometimes get asked for a phone number. Some stores still do that, or ask for your zip code. They’re basically trying to figure out where all of their shoppers come from. If they get enough people from one area, they might open a store there. That’s fine and good. My problem is exclusively with the savings card.

If everybody has one, that makes the card pretty much pointless on a savings level, doesn’t it? You’d think the general population would have figured this out by now, but since the general population is a bunch of fucking sheep I can see why we as a people still allow this shit to go on.

Ever since the current depression started stores obviously started losing business. They had to figure out a way to continue getting customers and making money, so they started having sales. Restaurants started putting more on their dollar menus, or creating dollar menus if they didn’t have one before. Some pizza places around here created half orders of things so that you could get what you used to love, but for less.

Grocery stores decided to give you a little plastic card that would help you save more money from their “already low everyday low prices.” Well if their prices are so fucking low already, why would they want to help you save even more to the point of anger?

True story. I stopped in a grocery store just a couple of years ago to pick something up for my boss at the time. This is when I worked in a butcher shop and we were making something that called for celery, yet we were out. So I went to the store. This particular store isn’t one I shop at ever, since there isn’t one near me. Even if there was I wouldn’t shop at it because they suck. It had been something but changed to a Main Street Market, and when I made this particular visit it was right after the change over.

When I went to the register with my celery the lady at the register asked me if I had their shoppers card. I said no. She asked me if I wanted one. I said no. She rolled her eyes, huffed, and walked away. She went to the customer service desk, dug around, found the managers card, brought it back to her register and scanned it for me. She had an attitude the rest of the time I was there, which wasn’t long. That was the last time I ever shopped there out of lack of necessity. So for one, getting a shoppers card for there would have been pointless on my behalf, and two, fuck her. What is she, the owner of the corporation? What is she doing running a register in Fairfield, OH on Patterson? They can’t be THAT short staffed. Otherwise and more likely, if she’s just a cashier, why the fuck did she care that much? Why did it ruin her day?

And what is the big deal if I saved that extra money? The store wanted to not make money that badly? They can’t possibly want to make less money. And by her using the managers card, it told her nothing about me or my shopping habits, even though my shopping habits at that point, and to this day, was one bag of celery. But it was that fucking important that a savings card be scanned. It was that important that I spend less money. It ruined her day, and I’m glad it did. Fuck her.

Also, fuck every major chain store. Fuck them. Walmart doesn’t have a savings card because they’ve overrun the world with their stores and their products, so they don’t need to have one. Everyone else though can suck a fat one. I’m so fucking sick of this shit.

Everything is on sale, all the time. You know what? I want to pay regular price again. If everything is on sale all the time, then those are the regular prices, thus making everything not on sale. Are you understanding what I’m saying? If everything is on sale all the time, then there’s no reason to have a regular price anymore. And if there’s no need for a regular price and the only price is the sale price, then the sale price turns into the regular price, thus making everything not on sale, just cheaper than it used to be.

I’m so sick of bargains and sales and savings cards. I want to shop at a mom and pop store and pay regular price. Not just to support them and their business, but because I feel dirty now. I feel cheap.

I went to a UDF last summer when they introduced their new savings card. UDF, for those of you who don’t live in Cincinnati (up until recently I thought they were a national chain, but I was wrong) UDF stands for United Dairy Farmers and they specialize in, ahem, dairy. Milk and ice cream specifically. They’re a hot spot for ice cream related products. I like them. They have a peanut butter milk shake that I’d slaughter babies for. But now they sell gas at most locations (and have for a while) and even more, they now have a savings card.

When they started advertising their card they said, “Never pay full price for gas again!” Thanks, but I haven’t for a long time. Because you’re late to the party, other gas stations already do this. I shop at Kroger and use my savings card. When I get enough points, I use my card at their gas station to save money at the pump. Or I can use it at another gas station company to save money at the pump. Or I can shop at another grocery store and use their savings card to earn points to save money at yet another gas station.

Are the oil companies aware of this shit?

Are the oil companies aware of this shit?

But it was when I saw that, their advertisement saying I should never pay full price for gas again, that pissed me off. Why? What’s so wrong with paying full price? We used to do it all the time not that fucking long ago. And it was no big deal. Because, as you’re well aware, when you want something you have to pay for it. There’s no shame in that. That’s how things have worked for many many years.

If a store really truly wants you to save money by shopping with them, they’ll lower their prices, no savings card needed. Even then they still didn’t lose money. If they dropped the price of cereal by ten cents a box, somewhere across the store they’d raise the price of malted milk balls by ten cents a box. They still made their money. But hopefully by you coming in to save money on the cereal, you did the rest of your shopping there thus giving them your full business.

Nobody takes less money for something on purpose, unless you go to some vendor and haggle the price down. If you go to buy a new car and talk them down in price, they might come down a little, but only because the price they SHOULD be selling the car for is what they’ll finally give you, not because they’re nice and decided to make less money on it.

Do you get it? They’re not here to help us out, they’re here to swindle the shit out of us. And they’re doing it under the guise of giving us more savings. Ever wonder why your favorite store continues to grow and build new locations if they’re making less money? Oh, they’re making their money. You might be spending less, but you’re losing something else by continuously falling for their shit. Your soul and your dignity. But I’m sure you parted with those years ago.

As for me, fuck them all. I can’t do it. The worst part about the Walgreens experience was, my wife decided to take the fucking card and then when she had to give the information, she gave MY information. Now my name and phone number are associated with the card. Awesome. And we didn’t even save money on our purchase today. Isn’t that just a swift kick in the balls?

I have more shoppers discount savings cards in my wallet than I have money. Kroger, Subway, Speedway, UDF, Walgreens, CVS… When will it end? Will we ever pay full price again? I’m kind of sick of saving money.

7 responses to “I Saved Money On This Blog Post

  1. You could just give the money you save to me…

  2. Yeeeessss. I have all the cards, and all the spammy emails to relate to this post.
    I will say, I do receive valuable savings at CVS and Kohl’s due to those cards. Last spring, just before we moved home, we all needed warm things, and I am not kidding when I say I saved more than half of my bill because of that little card. And that was nice, because the money I saved bought new tires. But I am still with you on the stupidity of shopper’s cards and their marketing tactics.
    Some stores save your debit/credit numbers and track your purchases, too!

    • Oh sure, some have advantages. But those are just a small price to pay for the store in question for what they get out of it. I also forgot to mention that while my wife was filling out the info at Walgreens the lady told her that if we ever forgot our card we could just use our phone number and I wanted to smack her. Oh really? So the rules for your card are the exact same as every shoppers card ever? Thanks for letting us know shit we already know. To me it sounded like she was nervously trying to mask their intentions with all of my info. Which is what they’re doing.

  3. I say “fuck no!” to all card offers. I’m just against them on principle. Most cashiers have a dummy card to scan so you still get the sale price anyway….

    • Yeah, and that’s what I typically deal with. But at that Main Street Market, I guess they hadn’t heard of those dummy cards yet. Man was she pissed at that situation. Cracks me up. I’m glad it was that serious to her, cause it sure as fuck wasn’t to me.

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