Wendy’s Is A Pile Of Shit

I know fast food isn’t good for anybody. It is what it is, cheap(ish) food fast(ish). I’ve had problems with every kind of fast food place, especially around here, from Burger King to McDonald’s to Taco Bell. Well, let’s add another to the list. Wendy’s (as if you couldn’t tell from the name of this blog) is a heaping pile of flaming shit.

We have one location very near our house, at 8240 Vine Street in Hartwell, Cincinnati, OH. Like, I could walk there in five minutes. If there wasn’t a grocery store at the end of my street, I could see the Wendy’s from my porch. My wife and I spend a lot of money there, because they’re right there and open late. Since we both work third shift, they’re one of few places open where we can grab a quick bite to eat before work. We could go to White Castle or Taco Bell or McDonald’s, but fuck those places. Well, fuck Wendy’s, too.

I don’t know where we’re going to get food from now, if anywhere. Maybe this is a sign that we should stop eating fast food all together and start packing our own food.

Here’s what happened. For starters, this particular Wendy’s has a history of sucking. I’ve been going to it my entire life. Before my wife and I lived in this house my grandmother did, so if I was going to visit her with my mom, sometimes we’d stop at that Wendy’s and grab some sandwiches for our visit. I can remember when I was a kid my mom would be complaining that they screwed something up. And now they do it so much it’s almost like they’re required to by the company to meet monthly quotas. I literally think their managers get weekly bonuses for fucking peoples orders up.

My wife likes to order their Junior Bacon Cheeseburgers, except she likes to add tomatoes and pickles to the sandwiches. Never mind the tomatoes for a minute, which is a recent addition to the sandwiches, since we’ve been going there and she’s been getting the JBC, she’s been adding pickles. She loves Wendy’s pickles, so she has them add extra pickles. The first time we asked for extra pickles the lady taking our order said, “They don’t come with pickles.” My exact response was, “So add pickles, and then put extra on them.” Is it that fucking hard to figure out? Holy shit.

Ever since then we’ve had issues getting a thing as simple as pickles added to the JBC. For a time we’d ask for them on the side, and that worked well for a while. We’d actually get them.

Recently I looked at the back of a receipt and found that if I went to their website and submitted feedback I could get $2 off a large sandwich on my next visit, so that’s what I did. They have a new sandwich out now, the Bacon Portabella Melt, which I can’t lie, is very fucking tasty.

This is not an ad. Wendy's does not sponsor me or my opinion.

This is not an ad. Wendy’s does not sponsor me or my opinion.

No, I won’t lie about the sandwich, which is what Wendy’s does. The mushrooms they use are not Portabella mushrooms. Side note, those mushrooms are typically spelled “Portobello,” but who gives a shit? Anyway, the mushrooms they use are regular fuck off mushrooms that can be purchased in a can at your local grocery store for less than a dollar.

This small can typically costs 75 cents or less.

This small can typically costs 75 cents or less.

I buy those mushrooms all the time. They’re good for cheapy mushrooms. And they taste exactly like those mushrooms on that Wendy’s sandwich. For those of you who don’t eat mushrooms or have never had Portobello mushrooms, Portobello mushrooms have a very distinct taste. They’re delicious, and they taste nothing like those regular mushrooms in a can. And the mushrooms on the burger at Wendy’s taste nothing like Portobello, nor do they share the size of Portobello mushrooms. You can see in the picture above that is the case. One Portobello mushroom is typically bigger than that entire can of mushrooms from Kroger.

Anyway, I decided I’d do the survey and get $2 off one of those sandwiches, because those sandwiches are awesome. I told Wendy’s everything I just said, about how we eat there upwards of three to four times a week and how we have issues getting our orders right. I got my $2 off code to write on the back of the receipt and I was happy. I had voiced my opinion directly to them (via their website that is probably run by some Asians in Spain) and I could sleep better.

Here’s a quick rundown of recent problems at this particular location, never mind the pickle problem.

– I once got the sandwich minus bacon because I am not a huge fan of bacon. Fuck the internet and memes, bacon is not the greatest thing ever. I returned home to find only about three of those little mushroom pieces on my burger. At least it didn’t have bacon on it.
-Another time I ordered a double of that sandwich, with no bacon. I got home to find I had a single. I took it back to them to correct. They gave me a double, with bacon. (Both fuck ups here were done by a manager.)
-I took my $2 off coupon to them and got the sandwich in a combo. They wouldn’t accept the coupon because it’s only good on a sandwich, not a combo. Make sense? Of course it fucking doesn’t, because they ring up the sandwich and the combo separately.

Tonight we asked for 2 JBC with tomato and pickle added. The screen immediately showed:


This isn’t the first time that has happened. I said to the man with a heavy sigh that we wanted everything on the sandwich, we were just ADDING (said with extreme emphasis) tomato and pickle. He said, “Oh, ok.”

We got the order and discovered the sandwiches had only tomato and pickle. We then drove up to where my wife works and there’s a Wendy’s there at 5490 Beach Blvd, Mason, OH, right across the street from that shitty ass Burger King I linked to above. We stopped in to get her a drink and some packets of mayo for her burgers. The small drink came up on the screen as costing $1.48. With tax it was $1.60 or something. When we got to the window the girl said the total was $1.90. I handed her $2 and she gave me back fifteen cents. True story.

When I got home I went to Wendy’s website and sent another message directly to their Mexican Asians. This is exactly what I sent them.

I wrote to you recently and told you how this particular location almost never gets our orders right. I told you how my wife and I spend a lot of our money there. Well, we’re done. We’ll find somewhere else to go. I’m so sick of the bare minimum competency held by the employees there. My wife gets the same thing there, every time. Two Junior Bacon Cheeseburgers, and we add tomato and pickles.

When we first started ordering pickles on the burgers, she wanted extra pickles on them because she loves your pickles. The first time I told them I wanted extra pickles on the burgers the lady said, “They don’t come with pickles.” Is it that hard to figure out that I’d like to ADD pickles to the sandwiches so that there are extra pickles on them? We’d pay for them if there was a charge, just get it right.

Then we had to start asking for the pickles on the side just to make sure we got them. Just because we said we wanted to add pickles to the burgers didn’t always mean we’d get pickles on them.

This fiasco happened almost every time we ordered this order, which was three to four times a week. And then we started getting a new problem. I’d order the sandwiches, say I wanted tomato and pickles ADDED, and they’d put on the order which we could see on the screen at the drive through “ONLY.” I’ve told them time and time again that we didn’t just want those two things on the burgers, we wanted everything that came on the burgers including the tomatoes and pickles. Sometimes they’d get it right, most of the time they wouldn’t. Tonight was one of the times when they didn’t get it right. When I saw the “ONLY” I once again said that we wanted everything else on the burgers too. The guy said, “Oh, okay.” We got our order and SURPRISE! Just tomatoes and pickles on the burgers.

It can’t be rocket science to work there and to do a halfway decent job, but apparently you’ve gone above and beyond to find the dumbest of the dumb to represent your company. Congratulations, your employees are idiots.

We’ll spend our money somewhere else. We don’t have throw away money, we work hard for what we got, which isn’t much. What little money we have we like to spend on food we enjoy from places who value our money and our patronage. Obviously you don’t give much of a shit about either one of those from us, so we’ll move on to some place that does.

Lastly, giving people extra large drinks instead of the normal sizes that everyone else does would be nice if you didn’t fill each cup entirely with ice before the drink is added. One of your extra large “large” drinks yields about as much to drink as everybody else’s mediums. Thanks for making me pay for a cup full of ice that has nothing to chill after three drinks.

Dave is undoubtedly rolling around in his grave right now.

Fuck Wendy’s. I’m so done with them and their shit. My wife’s drink was so full of ice she barely got her straw in it. Seriously. She doesn’t drink a lot, which is why she ordered a small, but I’m sure even she’ll be thirsty after that drink.

How hard is it? I know fast food is what it is, but that doesn’t mean we, as consumers, shouldn’t expect them to get our orders right. I know I should know better, and I do. I completely expect to get something fucked up at a fast food place, any of them. But we should hold them to the same standards we hold everything else to. We’re paying them 100% of the money for 100% of the product we order, nothing less. And we should get nothing less.

Fuck you Wendy’s, I’m done with you.

5 responses to “Wendy’s Is A Pile Of Shit

  1. Fast food really does suck.

    • It really does. Too bad there isn’t a fast food place that only sells homemade type food. I’d be all over that. Then they’d do so well that McDonald’s would buy them out and all of their food would become shit. Ugh, I can’t win.

      • Boston Market tries. Sometimes, it works. No fries though.

      • We used to have one of those near us and we tried it a couple of times. It always sucked. We never went back and that location closed. I recently discovered one that is still open and it shocked me. I thought they all closed. I’ve even tried their frozen meals you can get at the grocery store, and they suck too.

  2. Pingback: Daily Prompt: Good Fences? | Beefy's House o' Fun

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