Well fuckers, this is it. I’m done here. For all of my 520 followers and 2 actual readers, I wanted to let you all know that this site has done all it can for me, and I am now retiring it and the Beefy persona that has been part of my life for the last 15 years. The Facebook page is going to come down as well, but the Twitter account will still remain active, just because I enjoy using it. Lastly, if any of you actually follow my Tumblr page, you should probably stop. I do post on it from time to time, but it’s nothing worth seeing. So just stop.


You can unfollow this blog, and join me at my new place, Martians Attack! Why Martians? Cause fuck you, that’s why.

I’d like to say it’s been real, but whatever. Bye.

Shitty Restaurants: Cheddar’s

I watched an episode of Kitchen Nightmares once where Chef Gordon Ramsey was at some shit hole trying to help them make it work. One of the biggest problems they had was their “chef” who wasn’t very good at cooking. To test him, Chef Ramsey asked him to make an omelette. He couldn’t.

You see, Chef Ramsey asked the guy to make something simple. Not some sort of French duck dish. A fucking omelette. And he couldn’t do it.

This is how all restaurants should be judged, and this is how I judge all that I go to. I have certain things that I order, depending on what kind of restaurant I go to. My wife yells at me for never trying new things. But, it’s all part of my master plan. You see, among all other kinds of restaurants, if I go to a place that sells burgers, I order a burger. Specifically, a mushroom swiss burger, if they serve them. And if they can’t do that right, then why the hell would I want to order anything else from them?

Burgers are as American as American gets. They’re so American that on any given street where businesses abound, you can have three fast food burger joints lined up next to each other, and a new place will open across the street also selling burgers. Burgers are a staple. Anybody who cooks food of any kind should know how to cook a hamburger correctly. It’s not hard.

It is literally this easy. Take yourself however much ground beef you need. A quarter pound, third pound, half pound, whatever. You smoosh it with your hands until it resembles a patty. You cook it. It’s done. Sometimes you can even go all out and season it with a sprinkle of salt and pepper on each side while it cooks.

Now, was that so fucking hard? If you go to a sit down place, it shouldn’t take but 5 to 10 minutes for you to get your hamburger after you order it, depending on how busy the place is. They don’t take long to cook, and they’re easy to cook. And if you’re really good at making them, they don’t even need a lot of TLC. Once they’re on the grill, you literally only have to flip them once. I had a girlfriend who was like that.

The reason I bring this up is, my wife and I decided to try a new place that opened up here a couple years ago called Cheddar’s. Since I’m a fan of cheese and the name of the place is one of my favorite cheeses, I thought this would be a no brainer. Besides, the place looks awesome.

We had a date day one day and decided to eat there before going to see a movie. I saw they had a mushroom swiss burger and promptly ordered that, while getting the business from my wife about always ordering the same shit. She ordered fried chicken strips. I’m pretty sure we ordered an appetizer, like a quesadilla or something, but it wasn’t good enough for me to remember if we actually did order one or not.

Cheddar’s are located all over the mid-west. That doesn’t mean they’re good, it just means they’re a chain. Same could be said for Applebee’s. Fuck Applebee’s.
Continue reading

Album Review: If The River Was Whiskey

I recently wanted to know what the Spin Doctors were up to, and I discovered they had put out their sixth studio album, “If The River Was Whiskey” back in 2013. Curious, I picked it up and checked it out. What I found was quite impressive.

Naturally, as someone who wasn’t ever a big fan of theirs to begin with, my only knowledge of them was their hits from back in the 90s. What “If The River…” is, is 100% blues rock. I was delightfully surprised. Because it’s not just blues rock, it’s GOOD blues rock. It even has guitar solos, which a lot of newer rock doesn’t have.

I really don’t know what else to say about the album, other than it rocks and if you’re a fan of blues rock, you should definitely check this album out. I really hope the Spin Doctors aren’t done playing.

Here’s some interesting info. The Spin Doctors have been around since around 1989, but this is only their sixth album. The album before this one, “Nice Talking To Me,” came out in 2005.

Great Commercials: Steak ‘N Shake

I’ve been seeing these recently and I love ’em. Every time I think to myself how I should do this post. It’s been almost a dozen times. This time I actually forced myself off of the couch and got on the computer. Hey, I’ve had a rough week. I must have worked at least 10 hours. What I found when I looked was not just the two I had seen, but a third, new one! Well, it’s new to me. Anyway, if you haven’t seen these yet, I’m sure you’ll like them.

Album Review: Revolution Radio

I first became a Green Day fan when “Dookie” was released back in 1994. Now, over 20 years later, I’m jamming on another great album by them.

I appreciate that as artists they continue to push their own envelope by putting out something different while maintaining their sound. If you hear a Green Day song, you know it’s a Green Day song. Yet they’ve done everything from Punk to Rock Opera to an album that came across as more of an Unplugged album, and everything has been awesome.

I loved everything they put out from their two Lookout! Records albums up to “American Idiot.” I love “American Idiot,” but I didn’t want another one. So I didn’t bother listening to anything after that, until a couple weeks ago when I first heard “Bang Bang” on the radio, and I was hooked again.

As soon as it was available I acquired myself a copy of “Revolution Radio” and gave it a listen. I’m still listening. And listening.


Continue reading